“For me there is something primitively soothing about this music, and it went straight to my nervous system, making me feel ten feet tall.”
― Eric Clapton
Days 3 and 2
Whew and only a couple of days has passed since the last entry and an entire chapter has taken place. This is the next to last post I will be addressing to you. So it seems only fitting that I start my transition to No possible Josh Groban in your future view point…so this is going to be really unlike the past 102 posts.
I have been hunting and waiting for the inspiration for my next tattoo. Finally found it in several pieces and turned it into the artist I wanted to do the work and she came up with a beautiful one of a kind piece for me. So Tuesday I had it done. It seemed appropriate for some many reasons.
Here is the overview of the why I chose this symbolism….A combination of the Vesica Piscis-which is a sacred geometry pattern and a pair of Tribal-like Koi.
There are various meanings ascribed the Vesica Pisces, which is basically the intersection of two, overlapping spheres; such as the union of heaven and Earth in the body of Christ, the root element of the Flower of Life, the merging of God and Goddess, the vagina of the female goddess, the first pattern at the basis of all trigonometric configurations, square roots and harmonic dimensions; a source of great power and vitality, and as an overlying template that intersects with all the points on the Tree of Life. The Tree of Life, Flower of Life, and the Seed of Life overlap perfectly, with the Vesica Pisces providing all of the elements of the Flower of Life and all the coordinates for the Tree of Life.
Koi– In China, the carp, especially the colored ones, were seen as a sacred fish. Carp stood for strength, wisdom, perseverance and luck.
I am also a Pisces with Aries Rising…and actually carry an equal amount of both traits.
Then I had taken a gamble on an attempt to create an opportunity to promote a band I really like, especially when it became pretty apparent that this opportunity was not going to happen and yesterday morning I received a beautiful, thoughtful Not now letter— it still hit me like a ton of bricks that it was a no answer…I am hoping they will be open to a collaborative effort on what I am choosing to focus on next…we will see, I don’t really need their permission but I would still like to have it.
So I spent yesterday in quite a bit of a funk…no in a downright mode of despair, every nasty, ugly negative trash talk I could come up with was running through my mind all day yesterday…though absolutely no one knew about it, things like this …well you just don’t share with anyone….and it needed to run it’s course…. when I thought I had absolutely nothing left to offer myself in the form of trash talk…., well I got trashed and went to bed (after I got done with my evening job shift of course)….and woke with the most marvelous remnant of a dream…
I was a White Tiger laying in the middle of a group (what kind or species I am not clear on) and I was calm but then another White Tiger walked up to me and opened me right up…I could feel my reserved heart cracking wide open and feeling full and fierce….and then he walked away with nary a glance back at me…and I could feel the panic and despair…after all I have never seen one of my own kind and here I was offered this glimpse of another just like me…AND he was LEAVING?…and then I woke up. Yes I knew who the Tiger was…
Funny thing is that I woke up in a more reflective mode….this morning I spent the first few minutes outside with my coffee and reflecting that it was my choice how to see this white tiger…I chose love. I refuse to see him with any other kind of eyes…period…but what it led to was a thought process and where I thought I was completely derailed…well a run through Facebook feed declared that today was National Suicide Day.
I ran across two articles that talk about the writers attempts at Suicide…and I get that, been there….never done it, I always seem to be able to find the ray of light…though it gets harder and harder each time I sink and come back BUT I have still found the ray…the comment that stayed with me was I get to Choose to Choose Life every day I wake up…so this morning I took it back to Square One that hit me over the head at your concert in Houston on November 12 2013 and that was Writing, Photography and Music as one. Well I am adding one more to it. Travel. There are some things that I have been wanting to see, experience, photograph and then talk about…for me. So here is the basis for it….this is something I am not going to plan a whole lot of…the point being to be as free as possible for the next year…It will start on January 1, 2016.
- I found a cute little 19′ RV for 2144.00…in great shape.
- I have a list of places here in the US I want to see.
- I have the only band I ever wanted to go on tour with..
- AND I am going to bring together a Tribe via Facebook, Patreon, and Instagram (Twitter will be used to send out there too) ALL done..ala Amanda Palmer style-I am going to ASK for patronage.
- Look for my own sponsors
The rest of the music I take in and photograph is going to come in the form or suggestions from followers or even bands themselves. Topics will cover staying fit on the road, Eating Vegan using the $4.00 a day book, Yoga, Meditation my offering is this…..
Any and All Image work will be available for free-if you want it you have to pay to have it printed BUT I will not charge you to have it or use it AS LONG AS I GET THE CREDIT…that is the only stipulation and of course I would hope you would join my Tribe via Patreon. I am going to BLOG, VLOG and write about this year of seeing sights, hearing and photographing Indie Music and letting each day shape itself…I will also keep the door open for any White Tigers out there as well…maybe even the one that was in my dream… 🙂
BTW Here is what dreaming of White Tigers is about:
WHITE TIGER – Seeker of personal truth, having the power and strength of conviction, living simultaneously in the realms of both shadow and light. There is much mystery particularly associated with the White Tiger often referred to as “Spirit Tiger”. Tigers are associated with water and have all the characteristics of this element including healing, power through gentle flow, and feminine energies.
Tiger’s medicine also includes – being in the now, acting without analysis, passion, devotion, confidence, and courage. People with tiger as guide are very sensual and passionate. Tiger spirit animal symbolizes primal instincts, and the ability to trust yourself.
If Tiger enters your life, new adventures are almost certainly close by. New passion and power will stir inside of you. Your best work will happen in the night. By affinity with this spirit animal, you may enjoy dealing with life matters spontaneously and trusting your intuition.
And on that note, tomorrow will be my farewell letter to you…though I will keep you in my Pandora rotation and smile as your music comes on and sing to my favorite tunes….