“I believe that there is luminosity hiding in the shadow of the mundane. And things that hover at the periphery of our vision. If that’s magic, then I believe in it.”~ Natasha Mostert
Magic. Gratitude. Joy. Dreams. Hope.
I find that the more I turn to the blessing of each day, the more of the above flows in. It is not that intellectually I did not get it. I did…what I am seeing in bright and shining “proof” if you will is the manifestation of it. Literally little signs steering me and now my hand is just lightly on the wheel, as a steadier rather than wrestling it to point where I think it should go.
There were several mental commitments I made to myself when I sat down and “had” the mental conversation with myself ya know the one we all do with ourselves when we decide to GO FOR IT. For me that literally was sitting in the car on the way home from the concert on November 12, 2013. I had taken along someone to drive because I knew beyond a doubt that the adrenaline run would be so intense that I would not be able to drive. So here I was, still rushing and going through image by image the back of my camera and the steady run in the brain as all these ideas just started rolling in. I know you know what I am talking about, almost every creative I know of has this happen. Now hold that memory and understand I have been running that solidly, every day since November 12, 2013….and I am still here and the ideas are now shaping and reshaping and honing.
Mental Commitment 1) Truth be said-I am actually glad it has taken this long. I take a look at my original mock up and think, wow this does not even come close to the scope it is going to be. The commitment was that I would not become so attached to the process as the outcome. The outcome is to create a book centered on the Stages Album; your dreams of being on them as a teenager and now coming to them as an adult having shaped that dream and put your unique spin on it…and literally stepping onto the same stages that now hold the spirits of performance and film past….and when this book is created YOU will also have a tangible object. It is the same experience for all of us. Those still images, the body of work that sits in anyones hand who was there will recreate the memory fresh EVERY single time we look at it AND for those who were not there? They will be able to put your CD on and softly turn the pages, read the history of the theatre. See a few images from the concert and imagine themselves there.
Mental Commitment 2) That I would continue to closely examine my intent to this project and that I would work daily at keeping any ego out of it. I think, as I talk more about this, that people are beginning to understand that this is not about JOSH GROBAN per se. I am sure you are a great guy but this was NEVER about meeting you…It WAS about documenting, capturing and creating a tangible piece of art that’s central focus was the conjunction of DREAMS. Yours, mine AND the millions of people that listen to your music and will never be able to see you perform. Trust me, TV and CD or streaming is NEVER going to take the place of an in person live experience. The energy that is shared amongst the goers and the artist. It is a magical experience and the fact that you have decided to choose limited audience numbers for this tour, well that share is going to be exponentially more among 3000 people than 16K. My favorite experiences have been in the Tier Two band shows where you have maybe a few hundred and people are allowed to get up close and personal with each other AND the band and WOW the exchange is incredible, makes a believer out of you on live music venue performances…
Mental Commitment 3) GRATITUDE. This one takes a little more to explain. Along the way there has always been a helping hand. Be it the first people who listened and gave a piece of advice, or a string of hope…most of these never did more than that…however there are some that not just listened, they kept alongside of me, checked in with me OR actually gave me a HUGE boost…those boosts are still happening and as I go along this journey I will continue to publicly acknowledge them.
That becomes it’s own topic in a sense. Why those with tons of blessing are actually downright rude and mean and don’t get that when you receive abundance you keep giving it so the flow keeps coming?
The most gracious and giving have been those who are out there struggling right along side of me keeping up on their own dreams…these are the ones that understand that in order to achieve whatever your dream is, you have to help others too…as I do. Whether I have made strides towards my dream that day or not, if someone comes to me with a wish, a desire, a hope, a dream I listen and help in whatever way I can. Whether it is following through on an introduction to someone accompanied with a glowing recommendation from me as to why this person should listen to the connection or a monetary contribution for a GoFundMe campaign. In reality a couple of bucks and being present costs us NOTHING and We GAIN so much in return…
But here is a list so far that have stayed the distance in some form or fashion (along with links, readers support them too if you can)…this list automatically includes my personal friends that have continued to support me…they know who they are….specifically are:
Lina and her twin Tina of Twinz Co. Believed and keeps on believing. I still get texts from Lina just giving me a shot of love.
Hazy Ray-believed in my dream and were the first band I shot outside of you, Josh. I was welcomed into the band family and that is a HUGE thing for a band to do. They believed in my talent and we created a beautiful book together. They were instrumental in helping me develop my image technique by being so open.
I have to date shot over 40 bands and most of them because of a lovely man named Jose Arredondo. He gave me open access to these bands via the theatre he was in and his production company.
A bow of gratitude to Gina Mendello, Jesse Cook’s manager who was open and gracious about accommodating me and helping me to get in to shoot Jesse when he played in Austin last year. She has one of the images I shot of Jesse in her office.
A public acknowledgement to Christian Hebel’s photo blog administrator. Nicest person EVER. Helped me get a Fine Art Image from the Josh Groban-In the Round Tour delivered to him AND posted some of my images from the Josh Groban-In the Round Tour on the site. I really appreciate her kindness. She has, to date, been the ONLY person who treated as if I were a person and not some idiotic fan.
And to a group named Roxy Roca that has been open and gracious to my shooting them. Every song is amazing and every performance is outstanding. The two songs that have provided epiphanies for me are ” Happiness is a choice” and “It’s your Dream”….
So here I am going to end. Wishing Sweeney a belated birthday.
Each year we have them they are a blessing.
*PS-Dear Reader- The only favor I ask is that you follow the story, Share if you are so inclined. Know that I am following dreams as you do.